If Life was a Sweater

“If I gave you a sweater, and you loved it, I would know because you would wear it out so much you’d be on the verge of wearing it out, because you loved it that much. It would be the sweater you wear on Christmas and to get coffee and that you sleep in sometimes and that you drag around in the back of your car and tie around your waist. It would start to smell like you, and it would get snags and get all stretched out, and just looking at it would make you tell a thousand stories of where it’s been and who you’ve been in it.” (Shauna Niequist; Cold Tangerines).

This morning I woke up with a desire to change. I woke up with a longing in my heart to become the woman God desires of me. I do realize that this is something that will not happen in a 24-hour time period, or even in a week or a month, but it’s a change that happens over an entire lifetime. Staff have three weeks left here in Ocean City, NJ. That means three weeks of staff meetings and development, discipleship times, sharing on the boardwalk, days where you are able to spend hours immersed in God’s Word and engaged in fellowship with a body of Believers, who are passionate about walking in the Holy Spirit. It also means three weeks of living with 5 other wonderful staff girls, stuffing myself with the deliciousness of Kohrs Brothers frozen custard, Katina’s gyros, time of relaxation out in the sunshine on our porch and/or the beach, intimate time in prayer and reflection, and the amusement of seeing numerous people walking around with giant 20 oz WaWa coffee mugs or half gallons of sweet tea… It’s a different lifestyle which I have fallen in love with.

The “sweater” that Shauna Niequist is describing (in one of my favorite books of the year), is what I want the last three weeks of “life” that I have here on Summer Project to be like. I want it to be a well-loved gift. If I were to think that Project is over and God is done working, then I would be depriving myself (and other people) of everything that God still has in store.

Since being on Project, there have been numerous things that have taken precedent over my heart. Relationships back home, my own stubbornness and need for control, the ability and my desire to indulge in delicious foods and even social networking. All of these things have become distractions for me in one way or another. I woke up this morning realizing that if I don’t take full advantage of 1) what this Project has to offer and 2) what God wants to teach me while I’m here, then I am going to miss out on the full potential of what God may have in store for me by the end of it. As I humble myself and try to detach myself from these things, I will in turn make myself more available to God. He is my ultimate comfort, desire and goal.

“God gives us something amazing when He gives us life, and I want to live with gratitude. I want to live in a way that shows how much I appreciate the gift. If life were a sweater, I would wear it every day. I wouldn’t save it or keep it for a special occasion. I would find every opportunity to wear that sweater, and I’d wear it proudly, shamelessly, for days on end” (Shauna Niequist).

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